Monday, February 18, 2013

A Satellite's Last Words

Sally muttered to herself as she switched her electric winch to off. “By my calculations” she said as she wheeled a furniture dolly carrying the duct taped body of her nemesis Broderick into position, “you should be breaking through the atmosphere somewhere around the 4 minute mark. Of course if I’m wrong, you will plummet back to earth, or at least your ashes will after the ensuing fireball has burned itself away.”

Broderick’s eyes bulged but his voice remained calm. “Why are you doing this Sally? And what's with the rubber bands?”

Sally cradled the young man’s form into the center of her contraption, a Kevlar weave blanket hooked to giant carabiners which in turn were fabric welded onto one mile long rubber straps, now stretched to their limits, their distant ends lashed to a pair of lodgepole pine standing at the top of 3800 foot tall Morden’s Mount.

“Don’t ever ask a girl to the prom if you don’t intend to take her mister. But don’t look at this as punishment for your bad behavior; think of it as my helping you fulfill a dream. You always said you wanted to see the world. I’m just getting you far enough away to see it all at once!”

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