Sunday, April 7, 2013
A Grave Situation
The doorbell rang and I stood to answer it, but suddenly I was struck by the urge to turn the television onto channel 2. It seemed to be a security camera I was viewing, and there in living color was the profile of a petite blonde woman, impatiently tapping her feet. She reached to her fore, pressed a button and my bell rang again. I noted a speaker plate and button on the wall above the television and pressed. "Who is it?" Not the brightest comeback but I had no idea what was happening at that point.
She turned to face the camera and smiled. I had to sit; I was feeling a bit lightheaded. "Let me in" she said as she licked her lips, "I can't wait to have you again."
'Again' she'd said, as if I'd not remember having sex with Nicole Kidman! My eyes were glued to the screen as she slipped her dress open, playing body part hide and seek and giggling madly. Oh my freaking g-man it's Nicole Kidman and she wants ME!
I ran for the door to look for the entry buzzer when I caught my reflection in a nearby mirror. The person looking back at me had orange curly hair and a big red nose, white and black checked circles around his eyes and huge red shoes! I reached toward my face and saw my hand rise in the mirror. It was me! I was a clown! She wouldn't want to have sex with a clown! SHIT! What was I gonna do!?!?!