Tuesday, September 17, 2013

The Alphabet Project O is for Ogre (Shanty)



    Away in a crawl space there lives a great beast
He is massive and muscled; well, shoulders at least
And he sways on the crossbars of his own petard
While he munches on cookies of chocolate and lard

 
He has three alter egos he dons to escape
They’re complex and quite fragile, like rice paper crepe
But an ogre by birth, he has salt in his veins
And a partial control of all four of his brains

 

Hi, Ho, The Ogre we know
Is a cuddly curmudgeon
That loves eating crow

Hi, Hay, our Ogre would say
“I’ve a mission to piss off
some humans today!”

 

In his first incarnation, he thinks he’s a king
Of a land of forgetfulness, nonsense and bling
He’s an Erik of fable, an elf of the realm
Life’s a ship of misfortune and he’s at the helm

 

He can ooze melancholy as some might ooze whee’s,
thinks pain is a blessing and fun’s a disease
He takes walks into hell, and he swims in black holes
And he keeps his past present, like smoldering coals

 

Hi, Ho, The Ogre we know
Is a cuddly curmudgeon
That loves eating crow

Hi, Hay, our Ogre would say
“I’ve a mission to piss off
some humans today!”

 

In another persona, a poet he sees;
an obsessive who rhymes the most bland shooting breeze
He’s a Norse flavored godlet, a plucker of strings
and a bard who writes giggles into each song he sings

 

There’s a dog that he feeds and a horse that he rides
And six muses he chases in hopes they’ll be brides
He has crushed all his enemies, coddled his friends
It’s a profligate lifestyle our Bragi defends

 

Hi, Ho, The Ogre we know
Is a cuddly curmudgeon
That loves eating crow

Hi, Hay, our Ogre would say
“I’ve a mission to piss off
some humans today!”

 

In his last tragic mask he’s a human of sorts
One that likes neither beer nor professional sports
And he rides like a demon on two steel steeds
Searching love and adventure, the muse and good deeds

 

He’s a latent creative, a moss covered stone
Who has trouble in tooting his horn on his own
He’s a hermit reluctant, a dreamer of note
Who spends most of each day plugging holes in his boat

 

Hi, Ho, The Ogre we know
Is a cuddly curmudgeon
That loves eating crow

Hi, Hay, our Ogre would say
“I’ve a mission to piss off
some humans today!”

 

But genetically ogre, his heroes all wane
When he’s under the weather, an ogre-esque bane
Ogre’s dour and morose, yet he’s sharp tongued and shrill
Unless under the spell of his little green pill

 

If you have the great fortune of meeting one day
just remember he’s cute, but he’s mean all the way
There’s a reason he’s named Mighty Ogre for sure
He’s a certified enmity entrepreneur

 

Hi, Ho, The Ogre we know
Is a cuddly curmudgeon
That loves eating crow

Hi, Hay, our Ogre would say
“I’ve a mission to piss off
some humans today!”



voice version

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